


torrents

by rubanrose



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, First Meeting, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Kinda, M/M, a bit of angst, cute stuff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-25
Updated: 2017-02-25
Packaged: 2018-09-26 22:16:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,928
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9924326
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rubanrose/pseuds/rubanrose
Summary: When Taeil met Johnny, it was raining.





	

**Author's Note:**

> the first and the last part are the present, while the parts in the middle are their story, like flashbacks, if it was too confusing!  
> it was my first time writing johnil, i hope i didnt do too badly.

It was dark in the room, except for the night light plugged into the power outlet by the door. Raindrops repeatedly hit the window with force. The sound of thunder could be heard outside, disturbing the silence of the night.

Taeil used to be scared of thunder, when he was a kid. It was before he loved the rain. It was when waking up to a sunny day meant the day would be good, and storms were an annoyance.

It was a long time ago.

The air in the room was cold even though Taeil had closed the window hours before. He rolled closer to Johnny, throwing his leg around his waist and pulling the covers over their bodies.

Johnny took his hand, lacing their fingers together.

“Can’t sleep?” he asked, kissing the top of Taeil’s head.

Taeil hummed.

 

* * *

 

 

When Taeil met Johnny, it was raining. It was raining hard, pouring from the sky.

There was a party. Taeyong was drunk, making out with some girl in a corner. The house was too hot, and there were too many people. Taeil felt like he was suffocating. He had to go outside.

Taeil found him on the front porch. He was tall, his hand out under the rain, droplets hitting his palm. The air was chilly, the wind infiltrating Taeil’s thin long sleeved shirt.

“It’s cold,” Taeil said simply, walking up to him.

“But it’s better than inside,” Johnny said, and Taeil nodded. He listened to the sound the raindrops made when they hit the pavement, closing his eyes.

It was like music. He had never realized before how musical it sounded.

“I’ve never liked the rain,” Taeil said, breaking the comfortable silence between the two. He extended his hand, imitating the tall boy. The cold rain hit his skin, making him shiver. “But I think I’m changing my mind.”

“Isn’t it like the sky is letting go of everything it accumulated during the sunny days? All the fears and the pressure, the stress and overthinking. The sky’s letting go of all of it with the rain. Its confessing to the earth.”

Taeil turned his head to look at him. He hadn’t realized how beautiful he was.

And his words played again in Taeil’s mind. He let out a long breath. He hadn’t realized how straight his back had been, how the muscles in his shoulders had been tightly contracted.

“I wish I could let go, too,” Taeil admitted.

The boy didn’t say anything. He just gave Taeil a lopsided grin.

“I’m Johnny. Would you possibly like some ice cream?” he asked out of nowhere. Taeil crooked his head to the side, frowning. He thought of Taeyong inside the house, drunk.

Taeyong who wasn’t thinking about him at the moment.  

And ice cream did sound nice, even if Johnny was a stranger.

“I’m Taeil. And sure.”

Johnny had an umbrella. They stood under it, side by side, their shoulders brushing each other.

Rainy days were the best.

 

* * *

 

 

It was hard to bring it up in a conversation. People assumed you only come out once. Taeil knew that wasn’t how it really was. Every new meeting was a new coming out. There was a beginning. For Taeil, it had been his best friend. They were in their last year of high school, doing homework in Taeil’s room when Taeil said it. Taeyong had shrugged. He was on his phone, laying on the carpet of Taeil’s room.  

“You’re not crushing on me, right?” asked Taeyong after a few minutes during which Taeil anxiously waited in silence for Taeyong to say something more.

He threw a pillow at him. “You’re not my type, you moron.”

And since then, every time he met someone new, he had to come out to them. Coming outs had no end.

And then there was Johnny. It never came up when they talked. It was on the tip on Taeil’s tongue, but it never slipped out.

At first he told himself it was because they just became friends. He told himself he would wait until they were closer. He didn’t want to make their friendship awkward, not when they had just became friends.

And then they were close. Johnny would hold onto Taeil during scary movies. They walked through the park late at night, talking about their dreams and hopes. When Taeil came to the coffee shop where Johnny worked, the younger boy always gave him his employee discount and added extra whipped cream even when he wasn’t supposed to. They talked on the phone, late into the night until one of them fell asleep.

And Taeil still wasn’t telling him.

And he knew why.

It was because whenever Johnny was next to him, Taeil’s heart beat faster. It was because when Johnny texted him _good morning_ , Taeil couldn’t stop smiling for the rest of the day. It was because when they had to go different ways at the end of the night, something painfully pulled at Taeil’s heart.

It was because he was falling for him. Taeil was falling for Johnny so hard, so quickly.

Taeyong tried to urge him.

“Just tell him. He’s not gonna hate you because you’re gay. He loves you to the moon and back, no pun intended,” he had said, and even if Taeil tried to believe him, nothing he told himself could change his mind.

He just couldn’t tell him.

So when Johnny smiled at him Taeil smiled back, naively forgetting the longer he’d wait the more it’d hurt.

 

* * *

 

 

When Taeil decided that if he was friends with Johnny any longer, he’d be unable to live without him, he knew he had to end their friendship. He sat on a stool by the counter of the coffee shop while Johnny made coffee. Whenever Taeil tried to open his mouth, the words would be stuck in his throat and he’d be unable to tell him anything.

But he had to, or he knew he’d break. He had to trade heartbreak for heartbreak.

“I don’t think I can see you again after today,” Taeil finally said.

Johnny froze, he slowly looked up at Taeil, his eyes wide. He looked vulnerable, like a child and Taeil hated himself for having to hurt him too.

“Why?”

Taeil looked at him. His eyes well up with tears, his breaths short.

“Because it hurts. And I’m not going to be able to live without you if I keep being your friend. But it hurts, so much,” Taeil tried to explain.

“Taeil. I don’t understand,” Johnny said, speaking quickly.

“You’re gonna have to let me go. Or I’m going to drown.” Taeil stood up. He took a step backwards, towards the door.

He had to leave.

“Taeil. What do you mean? What did I do wrong?”

Johnny seemed panicked. He was holding tightly onto the counter, his knuckles white, his hands shaking.

“You didn’t do anything. Please don’t think it’s your fault, or I’m going to hate myself,” Taeil’s voice was shaking, tears falling down his cheeks. “It’s my fault. I was foolish, I should have stopped being your friend the moment I realized I had feelings for you.”

Johnny blinked, his hands slowly letting go on the counter.

“I’m in love with you, Johnny.”

And he ran. Taeil ran outside the coffee shop into the rainy night, not caring about his clothes or his hair. Sobs were making his entire body shake. His steps were clumsy and slow and Johnny was right behind him.

Johnny got hold of Taeil’s wrist, stopping him. Taeil stood there under the streetlamp, panting, the rain mixing with his tears. He was embarrassed about what he said.

Johnny took a few seconds to regain his breathing, his eyes never leaving Taeil.

“I love you too, idiot,” Johnny said. He raised a hand to his wet hair, running his fingers through it to push it back. “I thought I was obvious. I fell in love with you the first time I saw you, Moon Taeil. You listened to my bullshit about the rain when everyone always tell me to shut up. Your eyes were even twinkling when you looked at me. I could’ve kissed you right there,” Johnny continued as Taeil’s eyes widened. “You’re so beautiful, Taeil. When you smile, all the stars in the sky look dim next to you. Your laugh is better than a symphony, and when you sing, even my heart stops beating not to disturb you, so all I hear is you.”

Taeil didn’t know what to say. He stared at Johnny, the raindrops running down his face.

“So in the end, the earth confesses back to the sky?”

Johnny laughed. He reached forward, placing his hands on Taeil’s cheeks.

Taeil looked up at him, raising on his tiptoes to make himself taller. He placed his hands on Johnny’s shoulders, bringing him down to him to place his lips on his.

Taeil would say sparks exploded and butterflies flew in his stomach, but that wasn’t truly how it was. It was more of a bubbly feeling in his body, all the tightness, the accumulated stress that had built up on sunny days slowly flowing out, replaced by a sensation of well-being, relief mixed with the feeling of security Taeil felt when he was around Johnny. It was a new sensation, energy filling him up from head to toes.

It was a slow kiss where they shared all their feelings for each other. Taeil poured every ounce of love he had for Johnny into it. The taller boy’s hands moved to Taeil’s waist, pressing against his back, bringing him closer. Drenched clothes were against drenched clothes, the rain tickling their skin, water dripping from Taeil’s hair to his neck and down his back.

When Taeil pulled away, it was to sneeze.

“Let’s go back and dry ourselves before you catch a cold,” Johnny said, a worried look in his eyes.

Taeil took his hand. “If I blink will you disappear?”

“If you close the curtains, is the rain gone?”

 

* * *

 

“Rainy nights are like this,” said Taeil, drawing shapes on Johnny’s chest with his fingers. “I feel like I’m supposed to let go of secrets, of feelings. But once the sky and the earth are together, is there any point to the rain?”

“There’s always a point to the rain,” Johnny protested. He ran his hand through Taeil’s hair, the promise ring on his finger catching the light and then rolled them over to kiss Taeil’s lips. “It reminds me just how much I love you,” he said between kisses.

Taeil laughed, throwing his arms around Johnny’s neck.

“The two of us, do you think it was fate?” Taeil asked after a while, breaking a kiss.

Johnny frowned. “Maybe our meeting was fate. A music major and a literature major without a single common friend meeting on the front porch of that house. But I told myself that night that I’d never let you slip out of my fingers, when you smiled at me and it felt like the time stopped. Everything after that, for the past 2 years, it wasn’t fate. It was us. Fate doesn’t make relationships, humans do.”

“How can I love you more every single second?” Taeil whispered, his fingers running up the side of Johnny’s face.

“I mean, what is there not to love?”

Taeil laughed, the sound of his happiness echoing against the walls.

He fell asleep to the sound of Johnny’s heartbeat, mixing with the rain hitting the window, the thunder and the building creaking in the wind to create a melody.


End file.
